Once there was this little prairie dog who liked cranberry flavored toothpaste & when he went to the market to buy fish for his pet butterfly he got robbed by russian hobos cuz they thought he looked like Al Capone & they tried to drown him in a pool of blended stamps that they made the previous morning with there Sister in-law Gertrude who was involved with the Swiss mafia & helped them in the assassination of Aunt Jemima who had previously been in cahoots with Popeye because Popeye owned a pair of boots that were worn by Elvis when he did the video for Jailhouse rock but he didn't have evidence that they were really Elvis's so he traveled to Bolivia where a young man named Franz Shingleton assisted him in the burglary of 3 rare artifacts which were owned by a talking leaf blower who was a slave to a man who always wore pajamas because in his land there was no day due to the fact that the suns orbit was controlled by a group of Norwegian cannibals who had a theory that the right side of the human brain had control over what other people thought of them but this idea was shot down by The International Council of Theory Analyzing Caterpillars or TIC TAC which was coincidentally where the tasty mint candies came from & since it is the common belief that caterpillars can't talk it is very easy for the council to stay hidden from the workers in the Black Market who make a good profit off of baby Caterpillar eggs because they are actually TicTacs and can be used in the process of mattress manufacturing.