Does your past define who you are?
I think it does;not by dwelling upon it but in that it has shaped,in part,who I am.
Short version:
multiple ex's.
very kind and giving(to a fault)
sailorman for 8 years and lived the life
difficult for me to trust people(last ex tried to murder me)
tend to be attracted to women in need,either emotionally or financially.part of my desire to fix things
highly intelligent,but I ignore warning signs of a doomed relationship.
your thoughts?
Define?
No.
Compose a significant portion of?
Yes.
only if you let it, you should learn from past mistakes but not let if define who you are today
"sailorman for 8 years and lived the life"
Ok, I have to admit, Popeye is all I could think of reading that….
Sounds like you have yourself pegged. Now you have to work on not falling into the same relationships as before.
Being aware is half the battle.
Good luck.
either you learn from your past or you don’t.
I’ve slept with more men than I can think of and more than I’m proud of but I’ve been 100% faithful to my spouse of 10 yrs. What I did in my late teens and early 20s do not define me.
It’s what I’ve learned from them and what I can bring to the relationship.
Yes and No.
Yes your past can define who you are:- based on where you grew up and with certain values taught to you by your parents or guardians.
No your past doesn’t have to shape who you are:- based on your life experiences, expectations and yes, disappointments you and you only can choose to live your life the way you want to.
Finding your sole mate can prove difficult for anyone no matter who you are or where you came from, some one i spoke with some years ago once told me, "you will meet and like 100 people and 99 of that 100 are the wrong ones, so when you do find the one who respects, loves and adores you, hold onto that person, cause love don’t come easy’.
Have you gotten to 100 yet?…
Just be patient, don’t worry too much about the future, things have a way of just falling into place.
My guess is you were born a Leo (Zodiac Sign)
Got mail! BBL to answer your Q’s… :o)
You cannot have a future without a past .
The harder the past , the stronger the person you will become ?
My past defines who I "was" but not who I currently am. Everyone I dated helped me to know exactly what I was looking for in a husband and then when I found him, I just knew.
no. but it’s possible for you to let your past define who you are by not changing
It can if you let it. When you change yourself then you will attract different type of woman maybe better. It all depends on how you change yourself. If you change for the better you will attract better.
It does if you keep repeating it and letting it continue to be your present! When you find yourself falling into the same routine stop yourself! Look for a strong person that isn’t going to take advantage of you but won’t let you control them either. The point is to find a partner in life not a project..you can’t fix people they have to fix themselves.
I dont think it defines you completely some people have some bad past issues (like drug problems) and they are not forever defined as a drug addict but it does help shape you into the person you are today and as for your ex trying to murder you thats insane lol
I don’t think it defines you. You can decide on your own accord to make changes within yourself and be the sort of person you choose to be. I do think your past impacts you in a way that encourages you to make descions and be guarded or not guarded and rightlfuly so. Experiences help prepare us to make better descions down the road.
i do not think the past defines you - just cotnributes to who you are - it is in your power to change things - and IMO (based on experience), here is one thing YOU NEED TO CHANGE:
"tend to be attracted to women in need,either emotionally or financially."
"very kind and giving(to a fault)"
that’s a dangerous combination. if you can’t stop being attracted to loser women -at least stop letting them use you.
I think it does help you evolve into a better person. If you know your faults, then you need to work twice as hard on correcting them. Don’t use that as an excuse for you be taken advantage of. I don’t believe that people change, however, I do believe people grow to become a better individual.
yes it does it does
It doesn’t define who you are. It is responsible for a major part of your decision making process. It is also what led you up to where you are now.
It sounds like, you’re wanting to make a change from your current cycle. It looks like you approach things the same way which obviously leads to the same results.
The great thing about one’s past is that you will eventually learn from it.
In otherwords, you know what the red flags are now, and as much as you like taking in strays, you’ll find that it’s much easier when you find someone who isn’t totally damaged.
We all have baggage, it’s all a matter of whether you end up with a matching set.
Yes, my past has 100% defined who I am today. If the things that happened in my past didn’t happen I wouldn’t be where I am at in my life and I wouldn’t be the person that I am. A lot of crappy things happened, a lot of good things happened and all of them I learned from and the experiences are ones that I carry with me, as a reminder of the mistakes I made, the good choices I made etc. If it wasn’t for my past I wouldn’t have my present or my future!
I am in total agreement with you. We have lived parallel lives, and have found myself in the same boat. I want to say no that it does not, but now that I’m 57 and look back at my life, I have to say that it does effect and define whom you are.
Some people are slow learners .
Stop trying to marry every Women you get the Hots for .
yes we are what our past shaped us.It does not mean we live in the past but we tend to react in a situation depending on our experiences .We would have learnt bitter lessons in the past that would have made us extra care full today.
so the ans is yes your past define who u r!!
been through much abuse over the years, made me a better stronger person who now is an abuse advocate and doing major advocacy work in my community, state, and international with child sexual abuse issues
Your past will define who you are, if YOU LET IT..and dont want to change..
Of course our pasts have a huge influence on who we are today. My thoughts? I don’t think you’re "highly intelligent." Maybe mediumly intelligent.
Your past is your past.. Not unless you carry it with you then it will define who you are. If you leave the past in the past then it doesn’t define who you really are.
Your past should make you stronger! Your experiences teach you valuable lessons. You however are like one of my friends. He can pick a need woman 10 miles away. I think you need to fix whats making you want to fix others. Stop being a pleas-er. You might want to make a list of questions that are important to you, to ask your next partner. Are you afraid of being alone? how about taking sometime out for yourself. I think you need a break from all of the drama! unless that’s what you thrive on!
Definately!
The situations you encounter in life shape you every day. Hopefully you can learn from mistakes you’ve made, and realize what you can do from that point forward to make your life better.
There are so many decisions that I’ve made that I wonder about… If I had chose the opposite, where would I be now? I would be an entirely different person. My life would be completely different. But am I happy with how things have turned out? For the most part, yes.
Nope it dosent define who u r.Ur present defines who u r.
You may understand the issues but they still control you. We are drawn to what is familiar to us. That’s why you keep picking bad women to fall in love with. You apparently don’t have a backbone or any sense of worthiness. These keep you from living an full and happy life.
Get counseling and work on your spiritual life. If you don’t have a strong spiritual life, you’ll be floundering forever. Get to know God. Buy a Bible. Find a counselor who will encourage this. I made it. So will you.
You sound like a caring person who keeps getting jipped….Im sorry about that….but…dont change for everyone around you, live for yourself!!! You sound like you have a pretty good head on your shoulders and are intelligent….Your heart guides you…..that can lead to dangerous outcomes…..
Harden up a little…….otherwise you sound perfectly fine to me……..