Can you create an amusing tale that includes all these characters?

One Comment

1. Sunshine♥MattBaby says:

   July 9, 2010 at 4:09 am

   Dodge City , Kansas
   Circa 1875

   "ROACHES IN THE KITCHEN"
   Subtitle:
   "If The Big Bird Don’t Fly South For The Winter, He’s Sure To Freeze His *** Off Here."

   Festus: " Doc……I’m a’ tellin’ you right now, Michelin done swung at me when I was looking at (7)Miss Piggy, uhhhhhhh, I mean Miss Sarah. I wasn’t ready!! That’s why I fell into that cactus!!!!!!"

   Doc: " Just hold still while I pull out some more of the prickly spines.
   (5)Michelin……MAN! He got you good!" As he dabbed the many wounds, Festus jumped. "Take it easy. I’m almost done…..By the way, it isn’t very nice calling Sarah by that disparging name…Not nice at all."

   Festus: "Well, Doc…..she IS a bit on the hefty side and…."

   Doc: "And YOU’RE a bit on the dimwit side! (Festus scowled) There! I’m through. Kindly leave some money on the table before you leave."

   Festus: " Now about the money, Doc. Ol’ Matthew hasn’t paid me yet for helping him out in that Popeye / (6) Yosemite Sam
   case." ( Which he pronouces as Yo see mite)

   Doc:( Now HE scowls) "Humph!! So you’re BROKE! Surprise ,surprise! As for
   (9) Popeye the Sailor and that other fellow……they got drunk and were put in jail for a couple of hours….I would hardly refer to that as a CASE!"

   Festus:"Now, Doc, it was alot of work! They was so dang onery!"

   Doc:" Oh, get out of here……and PAY ME AS SOON AS MATT PAYS YOU!!!!"

   Festus:(Under his breath as he was leaving) " (2) Oscar the Grouch……sheesh!"

   As Festus headed over to the Long Branch Saloon, he heard screams.

   Miss Kitty:" (8) BUGS!!! Bunny….KILL THEM! KILL THEM!!"

   Bunny Hopalosky, a new waitress at the saloon, was running around frantically trying to kill some roaches that had crawled across the kitchen table at which Miss Kitty was sitting.

   Miss Kitty:"Stop pretending your (10) Cinderella in that two bit get -up of yours and KILL THE SUCKERS!!!!" Then she turned to the piano player. " (1) Felix……The Cat…..Get your cat over here at once. He’ll get rid of these roaches!!!!!"

   Felix was too drunk at that point to do anything except pound out a sloppy rendition of " If The (3)Big Bird Don’t Fly South For The Winter, He’s Sure To Freeze His ***
   Off Here."

   Amid all the confusion and chaos at the Long Branch there was one gentleman oblivious to it all. Monty Manilow, also known as Marshamallow Man ( due to his rotound appearance) was happily bragging to a couple of drunk cowpokes at a corner table.

   Monty Manilow:"And I’m telling you right now that MY horse is the fastest in the county….THE FASTEST!!"

   Cowpoke One to Cowpoke Two:" Ohhhhh, man!!! He’s bragging so much that his chest is puffing out…..Hic !!"

   Cowpoke Two to Cowpoke One:" Awwwwww, he’s got a right to brag." And then he spoke to Monty.
   (4)" Stay Pufted Marshmallow Man……Stay pufted!!! I don’t blame you ONE bit for all your boasting….. Not one dang bit….. Hic."

   The night ended with dead roaches and a few drunk cowboys being swept out onto the streets of Dodge.

   CAST OF CHARACTERS:

   Festus and Doc…… http://www.clipartof.com/images/clipart/xsmall2/17633_male_chinese_acupuncturist_doctor_preparing_to_insert_another_acupunture_needle_into_a_male_caucasian_patient39s_back.jpg

   Monty Manilow (AKA Stay Puft Marshmallow Man……….wearing Popeye’s outfit) http://www.refoyo.com/weblog/imagenes/marshmaloow_man.jpg

   Miss Kitty ……. http://www.flickr.com/photos/laurenvalentine/3629265085/